Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
