Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
only if we run a train.
done.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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