why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize