Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
