So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize
