Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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