Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
