i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
