Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
