just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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