i don't like sucking hair
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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