i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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