scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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