Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
