yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
