This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
