Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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