i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize
