Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
