you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize