Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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