how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
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