Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
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