i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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