just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
