it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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