How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Randomize
