You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
