Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
