God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
