Don't you send me to vm
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
