Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
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