yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
