I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Holy shit dude........stairs
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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