i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
