I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
