this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
