I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
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