If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
