he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
