I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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