i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
