But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
