question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
