just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
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