I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Randomize
