You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
only if we run a train.
done.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
