i was born a porn star she said
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Is this like a preordered booty call?
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
