The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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