Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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