Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
