What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
